Back to crap.

I just got home from a weekend of well deserved semi-relaxation.

D and I went to drop a boat off in Idaho. We stayed overnight and came home. It was good to spend some time with him. I feel like sometimes I hardly ever see him. I can appreciate how hard he works, but sometimes I feel like I need to make an appointment with him to schedule time in with me.

Im not complaining. I love him for all he does for me, for us, and for our future. I guess its the sacrifice we make in life. However it works, Im glad I got to spend some time with him. I love road trips. My heart is still slightly tender since my family left to go back home. I knew it would hurt when they left but not this much. But I would go through the pain again in a heartbeat to have all the time I had with them again.


I got home and called my dad to let him know we were home again. He talked to D for a while, while I caught up on my forums and stuff. When I got the phone he said something about my nan having a stroke. He wasnt too sure the condition she was in, nor what had happened, but said she would probably be okay. I didnt have much else to go on, and while I wasnt really feeling to well I decided to carry on with the conversation and try and put it to the back of my mind. At least I had someone in the moment. I had my dad to make me feel better. And I didnt really know what was going on with her, so I didnt want to freak out about something I (A) Had no control over and (B) Had little to no information on.

So I tried to carry on as usual, but towards the end of the phonecall I cut it short. My nerves had got the best of me.

I dont like hearing my nan is sick. We have had our ups and downs, but beyond that, she has always been one of my most brightest shining stars in my sky at night. Knowing she doesnt feel well doesnt bode to well on my mental health. You know, you hear something, and not knowing the full details your mind starts to race, you get panicky, and you assume things that you shouldnt because you dont know the situation. As far as I was concerned, STROKE wasnt a good word.

I told dad Id call him back when I found out what was going on with Nan.

I called the house. No answer. I called again. Still no answer.

I wrote the number down on the voicemail for a cellular phone. I called it, and someone picked up. It was my uncle Jimmy. I asked what was going on. He said my nan was a bit crook, and I should talk to someone else about whats wrong with her.

I called the house again. And again. And again.

Finally someone called me. Yep, my nan had a stroke. I cried tears of pain. Its weird, because, everyone was saying that they were thinking positive, and that she was going to be okay, but the tone in their voice wasnt as convincing.

Something was wrong, very wrong.

I spent the night checking in every hour to see if anything had changed. Well I did for most of the time. Until I couldnt get through. Someone left the charger at home, so the phone wasnt going. Damn batteries.